The Power Of “The Only”
All this talk about women’s empowerment, but is it really making a difference?
The latest Women in the Workforce report by Lean In and McKinsey and Company says, “No!” It’s not making a meaningful impact, at least not in corporate.
But what about the rest of society?
With the #metoo movement, a record number of women serving in the House, and a historic number of women running for President, more voices are out there. But, are people really listening?
Drowning In Women’s Voices?
Why do we feel like we’re drowning in women’s voices, yet we still feel uncertain if anyone is really hearing us or if it will make a difference?
A shift is happening, we can feel it. But at times it may also feel like we are going backward.
So what’s the problem? Women are working harder, they’ve been leaning in, so why not the progress we expected?
Yes, we need organizations to shift, we need men in the conversation, we need a culture transformation for real change to happen, But what about in the meantime?
The report also says too few women leads to too many “Onlys”, women who are the only or one of the only women in the room. It says being an only is challenging, their power and voice gets drowned out and they have a significantly worse experience.
There Is Power In Being “The Only”
While I agree it may be more difficult, I believe there is power in being the only.
My whole life I have been the only, the only Chinese girl in my neighborhood growing up, the only Chinese girl in school, the only Asian TV reporter at a station, the only Asian speaker at conferences……
Knowing I’m the only gives me power. But at the same time I don’t focus on it. The truth is many times I don’t notice. I’m at the table because I deserve to be there and so do you. Once I’m there that’s when the power of the only shows up. Power to have diversity of thought, power to plant the seed, power to be a translator for others who don’t have a voice, power to bring other “Onlys” into the conversation, until one day, there will be no more talk about being the only.
But how do you turn being “The Only” from a weakness into a strength? What can we learn from the onlys that will help you achieve your goals, thrive and create real change? While many consider “onlys” women. I believe many of us can relate to being the only regardless of gender. What are the lessons learned from those breaking barriers, defying the odds and making positive change? That’s what I’m exploring.
For now here are my 5 principles of The Power Of The Only.
- Own your power-Know who you are, what you stand for and know you belong there. You have everything you need inside you.
- Own your voice-You need to speak up, stand up and share your opinions with certainty, without need for validation.
- See being “The Only” as a privilege, not a burden.-No, you don’t stand for everyone and yes, it’s not your sole responsibility. But right now you have the opportunity, the opportunity to share, to educate, to enlighten, and open up the window for understanding and take a seat at the table. It’s a privilege. Do not waste your gift.
- Communicate in a way others can hear you. Know your audience, know what you want, listen with an open heart and integrate. Once they can see you and trust you, then they can really hear you.
- Come from a place of abundance, not scarcity. Yes, you are “the only” right now and the way to grow and succeed is not to maintain your status/power by keeping other only’s out. But to plant seeds, bring others in, and carve a new path for others to follow.
It’s time to step up into the gift you were given. Are you ready for the challenge and to take on the power of the only?
You are not alone. It’s time to come together.
Have you ever experienced the feeling of being the only?
Share now! #poweroftheonly
If this conversation calls to you I’d love to stay connected. Join “The Power of The Only” movement. Stay tuned for The Power Of The Only with Angela Chee podcast. Launching March 8th International Women’s Day.
Here's to you and your voice,
Keep sharing your stories.